very bad morning

P is out of town. He usually does the morning get ready stuff and drops off Victoria. I go into work for 7:30 and leave by 4:00 or 4:30 and pick V up by 5:00, leaving me very precious time on some days to run errands unencumbered. Today, I didn’t get into work until 8:30. I put on all the lights and let V get herself out of bed. She refused to use the potty or get out of her pajamas. I finally had to turn off the lights and pretend to go downstairs and then she cried, but got on the potty. She demanded books to be read. I told her we didn’t have time. She cried. I tried to change her shirt, etc while she was sitting on the potty. She whined and cried and protested.

I got her downstairs. She refused juice and water, shouting, crying, and whining. I put a banana in my bag and she started bawling and crying for it. It was the only one and really didn’t have anything else much to eat. Plus I knew I would give it to her and she wouldn’t eat it so it would be wasted. I am fairly obsessive about making lunches the night before, but last night I didn’t. I was making her lunch and took her water bottle and mixed in some water and diet ginger ale (it masks the taste of the miralax). She bawled and cried that “she didn’t want water”, AT LEAST 40 times. I ended up yelling at her twice to be quiet. I couldn’t take anymore. Finally I went over to try and get her dressed. She bawled about the choice of shoes and protested. I told her I was going to wear them then and she screamed and cried. I put her hat on her and she bawled and yelled because she “wanted to do it by myself”. She then fell off the chair and bawled. She kept asking for chex in a cup which I gave her. She kept on whining because the quantity wasn’t sufficient. I kept adding more. I helped her put her coat on and finally she would accept the shoes. I moved her Chex cup and she was so upset and grabbing it that she fell off the chair again. More bawling. I took one chex out of the cup and ate it (Have you tried the chocolate chex, they are good!) and she got so mad she hit me in the face. I was so angry. I sat her down in the chair, ripped her hat off, and made her look at me while I told her never ever to do that again. She cried and cried. She wanted to put the coat “on herself!” and pulled it off after all of my work and coaxing. I finally was seeing red and took out the bags to the car where again she followed me bawling that she needed “her coat zipped” and crying.


This entire 45 min I spent with my child today was made up entirely of her yelling, bawling, crying, screaming, and me yelling. I feel like a jerk. I finally got her into the car and strapped in. She said, “I love you momma”. I started to cry. I apologized for yelling at her, but told her she needed to listen and be a helper for mama.