Friday, October 23, 2009


So my Vi is now almost 15 months old. She is still a baby in some ways - likes her bottle at night, still wants her pureed, slightly chunky foods (no texture - and yes we are working hard on this - any ideas?), not too verbal or too much walking. She is such a big girl in some ways too - wanting to climb and play, be stubborn, be in the big kid classroom at school, do things her own way (did you notice stubborn?).

the last time I went into the infant classroom at school, I was in looovvee. The babies are so little, so snuggly, so cute! I need another baby. I'll even confess - we've been trying. (Well, as much trying as a couple that has a husband half that works 70 hour weeks can do).

On a more serious note, I need to accept the fact that there is a very good likelihood that I will not be able to have another baby. That Vi will be an only child. I have had such a long and devastating history of infertility that I need to accept the fact that my fertility is not "magically restored". Being Vi's mom has just given me so much hope and so much love that I can't help but want to add to our family. But I think I have to get my head around (as the Brits would say) that I'm pretty darn lucky already don't you think?


Alisha said...

Totally get it. I was hoping that having Christian would magically restore my fertility as well. NOT. Still no af and he's 14 months old--granted, I've been nursing, but still. 90% of women would have had an af by now. I guess it will be back to the bi-monthly "wands" for me, if you know what I mean.

Sometimes I wonder if I could deal with having just one. Before I had him, I swore that having 1 would be just fine. I still think of all the $, etc., that we would have if we only had Christian. But, I want a sibling for Christian, blah, blah, blah. You're right, I AM soooo lucky and blessed to have even one.

Anonymous said...

You are so blessed!