I thought this was a 'hoot' and wanted to pass it along for all those NOT from Northern Michigan and that I didn't email it to:
The only thing truly missing is some Nascar references.
Track season starts with indoor meets and the first three outdoor meets are cancelled because it's just too cold.
All the rest of the schools in the state are cancelled because of the snow or cold, but the buses are still running on time at home.
You know what radio station 1077 The Bay is all about and depend on them for weather related announcements.
Most people drive a 4-wheel drive truck.
An ice-scraper is necessary equipment for traveling anywhere September- April.
You've seen -50 temperatures more than once.
You spend your summer building deer stands.
Everyone in your school thinks that deer season should be considered a national holiday.
People sit in deer stands for hours on end in -20 weather just for the thrill of shooting a deer.
You get excited when you hear "Da Tirdy Point Buck" "Second Week of Deer Camp" and "Da Fourdy Pound Croppie" on the radio.
Everybody gets together in the spring and goes mudding.
Your hometown has more gas stations than stores in the mall(if there even is a mall).
You have more than one wild-life animal mounted in your home.
Pets are indefinitely kept outside.
You hail McDonald's as the all-mighty hangout place.
You can walk into McDonald's and know every high school-er in there.
The people in the town consider hockey players bigger heroes that football players.
Baseball players need a hat and mittens when the season starts.
Going to "Traverse CIty" or "Saginaw" is a big deal.
Shopping MUST be done out-of-town.
Your house runs on the heat of a wood stove.
You have gotten your tongue stuck on something metal.
You depend on Wal-Mart for your every need.
You feed the wild-life that lives in your yard.
You either have a cabin or stay at someone else's.
You own a snowmobile, 4-wheeler, and a jet-ski to cover all conditions.
The only "gym" there is to work out at is the one at the local high school.
They grow the girls big in your hometown.
Industrial Tech classes have more students than the art and music classes combined.
Your car is always dirty from driving on all the dirt roads.
It takes 3 hours to get to anywhere worth going.
The only thing to do on a Friday or Saturday night is to have a bonfire or rent movies with friends.
You've been out-hunted by a girl hunter.
You don't call a foot of snow falling overnight a state of emergency; you call it Wednesday.
You have combination bait, tackle and gift shops.
You drink beer brewed in Canada.
The majority of the parties you've attended in your life had one corner of the room set aside for people playing euchre.
People walk into banks wearing ski masks, and no one gets excited.
You can tell a person is a 'fudge' regardless of whether they have fudge in their possession.
Sitting for hours on a frozen lake in front of a hole in the ice is an activity you look forward to for months.
On your weekend trips on I-75, both Friday on the way out and Sunday on the way back, you're in the fast moving lane, looking across the median at the bumper-to-bumper crawl.
You're fiercely loyal about your particular make of truck.
Your wife has shot a buck.
You regularly drive on roads that have never been paved, and probably never will be.
You know every person you graduated from high school with.
You go to restaurants named after the person who is actually cooking the food.
You've helped push the vehicle of someone you've never met before out of a snowbank.
When you think of a 'pasty,' you think of something to eat, not something a stripper would wear.
You have seven right-handed gloves
You tap-tap your feet to knock of the snow before you get into your car
You're from the U.P.
You see the annual snowbird migration to the south
You put cherries in everything you eat
You wear four different-size jeans throughout the year
You can get to another town through the woods
You put plastic on your windows
You have a DUI or two
Anyone from below M-72 is from "the south"
You take your hooded parka everywhere - just in case
You have long underwear in three or more colors
You work your own hours, eat venison and fish regularly
You drive to Grand Rapids to catch a plane because it's half the price
Tourists make you late all summer but snow doesn't slow you down at all
Every restaurant menu: steak & whitefish, steak & whitefish, steak & whitefish...
You can greet every store or gas station counter person by their first name
You keep a broom in your car to clear your windows.
It's completely understandable to have an umbrella, snow shovel and swimsuit in your vehicle all on the same day.
You don't get a glass for your beer.
Da Yoopers are your wedding band.
You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from Northern Michigan